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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25599520">In My Head, In My Head</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/2queer4here/pseuds/2queer4here'>2queer4here</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Saturday Night Live RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Jealousy, M/M, Pining</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:14:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>793</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25599520</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/2queer4here/pseuds/2queer4here</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>His dick is hard and he's pining for both of his best friends.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Life is complicated.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Colson Baker | Machine Gun Kelly/Pete Davidson, Pete Davidson/John Mulaney</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>60</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>In My Head, In My Head</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Title from Bloody Valentine by Machine Gun Kelly.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>He does this a lot- tends to go after other famous people who are undoubtedly more famous than he is but are still technically able to be lumped into a similar group as him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>John is single and probably one of his more famous friends. Buying Kanye an outrageously priced smorgasbord doesn't mean the guy knows Pete's name, probably doesn't even remember his own name with how far down into the sunken place he is. And though Kid Cudi is his favourite artist and they still text occasionally, he has to admit the guy hasn't been relevant since back when Pete was in high school. </span>
  <em>
    <span>John Mulaney</span>
  </em>
  <span> though is getting to be a household name.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>People fell in love with his romantic 1920s character that seemed to have popped up on the comedy scene from out of nowhere. Pete sure had. Pete was usually wrong about his gut instincts, probably from all the anxiety, but he felt it in his bones that after exchanging numbers with John in an attempt to network months ago that nothing would actually come of it. John would hit bigger stardom rising from D-list (ha d) to A-list celeb in no time and never have a need to hang around that one crackhead from SNL again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But he was wrong.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>John had texted him immediately after the social event and continued to chat with him daily sending Pete awkward snapchat selfies, asking about instagram, and just generally worming his way into Pete's drugged out heart.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>So he had to text Kells to let him know he needed to send Pete back the best friend mug he'd made for his bestie on their surprise road trip. Only so that he could have the number two engraved after the best friend part.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Because it's okay to have two best friends nowadays when back in the day he only had one and that one was his mom. Sometimes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He loves Colson in a way that's 35% inexplicably primal, 22% horny, and 37% fun. That might not add up to 100 but Pete's never been good at math and even if he was, thinking about Colson sometimes makes him uncomfortable because, like, Colson's got a kid. A great little girl who is his whole world and she calls him Uncle Pete which is just so fucking cute man, but heartbreaking because his bestfriend will never be able to love anyone more than that kid. Which is good. That's how it should be but Pete gets jealous. Pete gets jealous. Pete gets so overwhelmingly horribly loser jealous. Of an 8 year old. Because her dad loves her and so sometimes he doesn't know how to engage with her because it's not like they can just talk this shit out. He can't say "hey kiddo whenever your dad gets me on my back I feel like I'm gonna explode from how intensely I love him but he can never love me as much as he loves you, which is great for you but bad for me".</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Mostly because the fbi would probably bust down his door for talking about sex with a minor even if it was just about getting plowed by her dad. And then his mom would kill him. His mom doesn't deserve a pervert for a son, she's a good lady.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And Kells wouldn't be his best friend if he wasn't so literate in body language and tone; so he knows it's just a Pete Thing that Pete has to get over and sometimes he has to pull away for a bit, but he always comes back. And Colson and his daughter always let him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>So lately he's been pulling away and pushing his way into John Mulaney's life and bed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’s got these great sheets that must be like 4 million threat count, because no way does Target sell sheets this great even though Pete was there at Target when John bought these exact sheets, so maybe it has more to do with John himself and brain stuff than the actual sheets, and he's got this great white comforter that Pete's tried to no avail to steal no less than eight times.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Pete lays in the noisy dark of New York night listening to the far off yet sharp taxi whistles and heels clicking on sidewalks. It's quiet and deafening at the same time but it helps calm his nerves. That and the weed. His mom is worried he's squandering away his 'millions' on weed. His mom thinks he makes more at SNL than he actually does. He isn't Kate. Or Colin. He doesn't have it like they do but he still has it. His dick is hard and he's pining for both of his best friends. Life is complicated. </span>
</p>
<p>
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</p>
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